32nd Re-Rooters Ceremony 2015 – Hands Up! We Can’t Breathe!

Cape Cod Times, photo by Ron Schloerb

Cape Cod Times, photo by Ron Schloerb

32nd Annual Re-Rooters Day Ceremony – 1-7-2015 – Provincetown Harbor
Hands Up! We Can’t Breathe!
!ehtaerB t’naC eW !pU sdnaH

Here is some of the text from the ceremony:

The Lord appeared to Moses in the form of a burning bush and gave him…

The Ten Commandments of Fish-less Thought Leaders

  1. Asymmetric warfare is the Lord Thy God and thou shalt not have carbon-dense  prayer farming apparently manspreading snarky textpectations;
                       CHANT AFTER EACH: !ehtaerB t’naC eW !pU sdnaH
  1. Thou shalt not bashtag polar-vortexed homeless leveraging hackeried face-time inversions with rectal feeding;
  1. Thou shalt not bestie anti-vaxxers branding delethalization of food sovereignty cray-craying as the charmed New Abnormals;
  1. Thou shalt not keep holy the talking dead eavesdropping on the untraceable deported analytics lockdowned by neck-bearded denialists;
  1. Honor Thy Father and Thy Mother: Tar + Sands;
  2. Thou shalt not kill wearable ephemeral content fraudstering pre-conflict separatists’global reputation economy;
  1. Thou shalt not commit throwback extinctions quarantined by misery-indexed trigger warning insolvent mergers fracking down on undergarmented broken windows;
  1. Thou shalt not steal petro-states scientifically trafficking uber elephants consciously uncoupling trusticle draughts;
  1. Thou shalt not bear false witness against disinterestednessed pathogens ecosiding uber-heroes’ dark moneyed enhanced interrogations;
  1. Thou shalt not covet webward drone strikes life hacking the right-to-be-forgotten hoaxers bioengineering fish-less thought leaders;

Let it be known that the devils and sinners who deceive us shall be cast into the lake of fire and brimstone where the beasts and false profits are, and shall be tormented day and night for ever and ever. Amen.

Twelve Days of Stockpiling 2015
(Twelve Days of Christmas)
  1. And scientificality
  2. GamerGates
  3. Petro-states
  4. Motion seats
  5. * * Misery indexes
  6. Anti-vaxxers
  7. Textpectations
  8. Trusticles
  9. Climate hoaxers
  10. New Abnormals
  11. Climate denialers
  12. Uber-heroes

Burning Man

By Eric Williams and Jason Kolnos
Cape Cod Times,  Jan. 7, 2015
Click here to see VIDEO


PROVINCETOWN — If you purge it, Jay will burn it. That’s the sizzle behind Re-Rooters day, a voyage into kooky conflagration at the Cape tip. Ringmaster and flame-provider Jay Critchley led the 32nd annual affair Wednesday evening with a deft mix of nonsense and dignity. A loyal and chilled crowd of about 30 sang silly songs and repeated odd phrases.
“Thou shalt not hashtag polar-vortexted homeless leveraging hackeried face-time inversions,” Critchley informed his audience at one point. They seemed to agree.

But the ignition point of any Re-Rooters ceremony comes when Critchley, a Provincetown artist, asks folks to place items they would like to get rid of in a dry old Christmas tree.
That’s when the burdens of the past year are revealed.
First-time Re-Rooter Paige Riley of Harwich, who has been battling breast cancer, wanted to move on from her illness and tossed her bra onto the tree.
Provincetown resident Debbie Nadolney stuffed in something she regretted ever writing.
“I purged a sad love poem because I’m feeling so much better these days. So I’m letting go of fear,” she said.
With a tree-full of purges snugly nestled in a small boat, Critchley did the only sensible thing: torched that bad boy and walked it out to sea.
With 2014 safely scorched into history, we asked for Jay’s take on 2015.
“Absolutely cray-cray,” said Critchley.

The US Capitol building encrusted in sand by Sand-a Claus!

Jay Critchley, IRS President (International Re-Rooters Society) reroot@comcast.net


WASHINGTON, DC. Like a sandstorm paralyzing the city, lawmakers have put a pall over US Congress – and a blanket of sand – and smothered the spirit of Christmas itself.

To mark this occasion, artist Jay Critchley, President of the IRS (International Re-Rooters Society), has sent a postcard of holiday greetings to all US Congressional Representatives and US Senators with an image of the Congressional Building encrusted in sand, with a sand–enshrouded Sand-a Claus looming over the lopsided chambers. “Yes Virginia, there is a Sand-a Claus”? it reads. **

“We’ve squeezed the last bit of joy from the American people – no pain, no gain,” quipped a Congressmen with a satisfied grin – off the record – as he rushed to catch the corporate jet flying him home for the holidays.

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Safeguarding Provincetown Art – Fish ‘n’ Chips

A permanent installation, Fish ‘n’ Chips, was installed at the Provincetown Community Center in the early 1980s after a fire renovation. It’s created from fish skins, naturally colored sand and Motorola computer chips (made from silicone/sand). The building is being repurposed so it’s been removed for its next journey. Thanks to the Town Art Commission, Jim Bakker, Acting Town Manager David Gardner, Ginny Binder Associates, Kyle and Nate.




Blessed Virgin Rubber Goddess speaks of Ebola Virus

ENOLA EBOLA – Atomic Virus

O Mystical Rose of Eden, Protectress of the Rainforest, in our fear and anguish at environmental ruination and infestation of the Ebola virus, 50 years after the dropping of the atomic bombs by the Enola Gay, we beseech Thee!

We became aware of the Ebola Virus in 1995 on the 50th anniversary of the dropping of the Atomic Bombs by the Enola Gay (1945). The Blessed Virgin Rubber Goddess spoke to us then – and now – as we continue the destructive power of war.

Enola Ebola

Restore the precious immune system of the earth. Protect us with Thy radiant rubber mantle, that Thou might embrace and touch all creatures with renewed immunity. O Protectress of the Rainforest, console us all, our families and our lovers, with they healing grace. (Concentrate on your desires.) Amen.

Image by Lydia Eccles

Edward Snowden in Provincetown!

Edward Snowden, NSA Whistleblower, meets Mario Savio of the historic Free Speech Movement (UC Berkeley, California 1964), in PLANET SNOWVIO;  A Benefit Staged Reading of an experimental musical by Jay Critchley; Obama and Putin appear; at Provincetown Theater Saturday, August 23, 2014, 7:30pm.

Planet Snowvio PosterWho travels to the beat of a “Different Drum”? 

“Did Mark Twain have it right? ‘History doesn’t repeat itself – but it rhymes.’  Where is the dissonance?”  – Jay Critchley

Multi-media artist Jay Critchley will present a staged reading of his new experimental musical, PLANET SNOWVIO.   The one-act play is based on the meeting of NSA whistleblower Edward Snowden and Mario Savio, leader of the Free Speech Movement (FSM), which transformed political and anti-war protests nation-wide and beyond. On their journey to PLANET SNOWVIO they encounter Russian President Vladimir Putin and US President Barack Obama.  This political satire is sprinkled with humorous interpretations of classic pop songs.

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Planet Snowvio featured in San Francisco Chronicle

Savio, Snowden brought together for musical number

By Robert Hurwitt, San Francisco Chronicle

April 22, 2014

SAN FRANCISCO — Mario Savio and Edward Snowden walk into an art gallery – and sing “I Got You Babe.”

It’s more political than you might think. And not just because the Free Speech Movement icon and the NSA whistle-blower also wail Sam Cooke’s “A Change Is Gonna Come.”

“Planet Snowvio,” which makes its debut in the form of a staged concert-reading Sunday at UC Berkeley Art Museum, is “a musical pop parody” by multimedia conceptual artist Jay Critchley. A longtime resident of Provincetown, Mass. – at the far tip of Cape Cod – the 67-year-old Critchley has spent half his life creating projects ranging from installations and rituals to mock corporations (such as his Old Glory Condom Corporation), on gender, environmental and other political themes, usually with a comic edge.


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